Several people find my blog every day while searching “zales customer service representative” in google. Because I love* Zales so much, and really, really want them to know just how much I appreciate their sincere love for their customers, I’ve taken it upon myself to help everyone out and do the leg work. Here’s how to get to customer service (and a real, honest-to-goodness person).

Call 1-800-311-5393. In the list of options, listen for the least-likely-to-be-a-robot option. When someone comes on the line, immediately tell them that you’ve been working with Keisha, a supervisor. Keisha is not only willing and able to do anything she wants, but can also do nothing wrong, so she’s your best bet. And, if, by chance, you get ahold of her, do me a big favor and tell her that Ben Barnes sent you.

*by love, I really mean hate, loathe, detest, barely tolerate.