And We’re Back…

After a two week break, it’s time to get back down to business and start blogging again. My schedule is back on track with no more holidays in the near future, no vacations planned, and hopefully no sick days coming. So… starting tomorrow, I’ll blog again. Well, if I have something to say and don’t forget that I’ve got a blog.

So Much To Do, I’ll Go Away For A Few Days…

I’ve got a lot of things to accomplish over the next month or so. But I’m about ten minutes from leaving for a youth retreat that I’ll be leading worship for. I love being with the people I’ll be with. And I love leading. And the extra money is rad right now… especially with a wedding coming. But being away from the fiance and my jobs and my ever-growing list of tasks is quite difficult. I guess that means I can try to multi-task while I’m away. Well, maybe. Hopefully. Have a safe holiday, all!

I’ve Noticed…

Several people find my blog every day while searching “zales customer service representative” in google. Because I love* Zales so much, and really, really want them to know just how much I appreciate their sincere love for their customers, I’ve taken it upon myself to help everyone out and do the leg work. Here’s how to get to customer service (and a real, honest-to-goodness person).

Call 1-800-311-5393. In the list of options, listen for the least-likely-to-be-a-robot option. When someone comes on the line, immediately tell them that you’ve been working with Keisha, a supervisor. Keisha is not only willing and able to do anything she wants, but can also do nothing wrong, so she’s your best bet. And, if, by chance, you get ahold of her, do me a big favor and tell her that Ben Barnes sent you.

*by love, I really mean hate, loathe, detest, barely tolerate.

No Thanks, I Use Chop Sticks

While having lunch at a Chinese cuisine buffet this afternoon, I noticed someone a few booths over looking at me with a terrible look on their face. After trying for a LONG time (the whole meal) to figure out what on earth made this seemingly sweet old lady look at me as if I had recently cut her hair off and superglued it to her back, I realized that she was impressed. By what, you ask? Well, I happen to use chop sticks when I eat Chinese food. Not because I think it’s fun or to impress those around me, though both of those things are true. I use the chop sticks to eat Chinese because that’s how real Chinese people eat food. Do I feel superior to those that use forks to eat? No. But I want the full experience. Part of eating at the Chinese buffet is the experience. I like the weird scary music, the bizarre smells, the odd moving paintings and the sincerely ugly booth upholstery. The environment is great. The food is great. But without the chop sticks, it’s just not the full experience. So I got a crazy look from a little old lady because I used chop sticks. I guess I took this away from lunch today… It must be hard for people to accept that people are different. And not just in skin color. We’re talking experiences and mindsets. I also took away from lunch a headache and a very strong urge to take a nap. Anybody know if you can die from an MSG allergy?

Ho ho ho.

I always think of awkward little Ralphy and the creepy kid in front of him with the 1930’s flight helmet/goggles when they stood in line to see santa.  Then I think of that really awesome scene in Step Brothers when the “boys” are both crying after the big divorce announcement and the jerky older brother takes a picture of them crying with weekend dad smiling and laughing.  Oh, holiday memories.  Well, now that I’ve seen the following video, I’ll be remembering this as well.  And thanks to technology, so will you…

Tax Time

I started thinking about my 2009 taxes this week.  Obviously I haven’t gotten any W-2 forms from my employers yet (because they’re supposed to keep paying me until year’s end).  But with the information I’ve got from paystubs and shady accountant-types at my places of work, I have enough to go by to fill out an estimated tax form… which I’ve done.  And the IRS fairies are smiling on me this year.

What’s the difference this year from last, you might ask?  Well, for one thing, I’ve been giving things to people less fortunate.  Are there people with less than me?  Yeah.  Surprisingly enough, there are.  So I’ve been sharing my time and energy and gas and cash with others.  I’ve also figured out a way (with the help of the previously mentioned IRS fairies) to turn my hobbies and talents into tax deductions and credits.  Thanks be to a government that helps out the givers.

All of that to say this… It’ll be nice to get a nice fat check at the first part of the year.

Wheel bearings

I don’t mind getting car repairs done. Especially when the repairs are reqired and help keep me safely on the road. Today I picked up my car after a repair to take it for a separate maintanance issue. When I got to the 2nd shop, they found an issue with the first repair. Because the mechanics knew each other, they took care of the problem without involving my wallet, which was just fine with me. It’s funny to think that a very small problem could cause a trained professional to freak out. I’m sure they saw the problems and realized that my safety was in question. Good thing I’m pretty much a mechanical nincompoop.

Hard News

I got hard news today.  Not life-shattering news or anything, but not good news.  The kind of news that makes you want to either kill a man or go home and sleep for three days on the couch.  Either way, those both seemed like options when I got the news.  The moment I heard what I heard, I had this very real and very clear thought.  So clear, in fact, that I ignored part of the news to notice how substantial the thought was.  And here’s what spun in my head as I took in the pile of information that made my day what it’s become.

When someone gives you information, either good or bad, the messenger should be in a position, both physically and emotionally, appropriate for the news they’re delivering.  A message of “The War is Over!!!” wouldn’t come from a sorrowful and bitter voice.  The statement, “We got your test results back, and it’s not good,” would not be filled with laughter and smiles.  Those would seem like acts of a madman.  Part of having a soul is knowing good from bad and right from wrong… or so I’ve heard.

When I was receiving my news today, it was coming from a smiling face.  A face that seemed to say, “We’re ok with this.”  But the news was quite different.  The news was more, “This isn’t something you’re gonna want to be standing for.”  That’s quite misleading.  It’s unnerving.  And it’s grounds for a good swift kick to the Don Johnson.

I didn’t do any kicking.  I didn’t even freak out and tear up the driveway on the way out.  I just quietly accepted the news and tried very hard to let it go.  I’m sure that within a few days, I’ll come up with a good plan of action to change the news I got.  But until then, I’ll just say this… look out, dude, because when you’re not looking, you may get a golf club shaped bruise somewhere between your knees.

The Latest

It seems like It’s been a little longer than I’d hoped.  I really tried to post regularly this fall, but here I am writing a post after probably a week (or more) after a truly long day of eating things I shouldn’t, doing things I shouldn’t and acting in ways I shouldn’t.  Here’s a numbered list* (in no particular order) of the things that are new and/or interesting in my world these days.

1.  I got engaged

2.  I spent Thanksgiving with my fiance & family at Disneyland

3.  I bought a Cadillac

4.  My morning job got a new website.

5.  Christmas is in a month.

 

*Who doesn’t love one of those?!?!

Patience

I drive roughly 30 miles one way to work every day.  I don’t mind the drive… I kind of like that half hour/45 minutes to mentally prepare myself for a big day or to decompress from a long day.  Not that I enjoy spending a large sum of money on gas every few days.  Or the wasted 3-4 hours per week just sitting in a car.  But the commute isn’t terrible.  That is, it WASN’T terrible.  Until days like today.

I94 has this very strange and mysterious way of becoming a parking lot at rush hour*.  Last week, State Troopers had people pulled over at four mile increments, which made every vehicle slow way down and get into the passing lane.  I’m not sure how the police did that, but it was somehow magical.  The four mile separation caused a twenty mile freeway commute turn into an hour & a half drive.  Today was a totally different story.  There were three accidents within three miles of each other.  The first was a semi truck that flipped over in the westbound lane (I was headed east).  For reasons that I can only assume are based on the noseyness of people, the eastbound lane was at a dead stop for five miles while people got their fill of wreckage, then drove away.  A mile further down, two cars (who I would be willing to bet a vital organ were gawkers from the first accident) somehow bumped into each other and exploded with car parts thrown across the westbound lane.  Again… several miles of backup so people can see dead bodies**.  And the final accident was a frozen food truck that had either broken down in a lane or had run over a poor old chevy van or something.  There was something behind the semi truck’s rear axle, but I couldn’t tell if it was the truck’s cargo or a vehicle’s remains.  Because the truck was in the road and there were emergency personnel running back and forth from fire truck to frozen food truck to the ambulance to the oncoming traffic, there were several more miles of back up.  Quite a morning commute.

Maybe it’s time to stop commuting.  My nerves are shot… and it’s been 4 hours.  Granted, I WAS on the same 1 mile patch of freeway for 45 minutes.  Maybe I’ll take the rest of the day off to calm down.  Or maybe it’s time to rethink that hypertension idea.

* I use the term hour loosely.  It’s really more like three hours at either end of the work day.

** By bodies, I actually mean vehicles, not people.  There were no people in the cars at the time of collision.  Those people were still back watching the 1st accident victims get taken away in ambulances.  Looking back, that is probably the biggest cause of their accident.