There’s something I’ve been thinking about for a while. Let me explain the why first, and then I’ll explain the thought. Ok. So first, I’m a worship pastor. I spend my Sundays on stage and my weekdays at a desk, planning, contacting, scheduling, rehearsing, apologizing and drinking coffee. There’s part I. Part II is this… What is it about the post-seeker movement* that bugs me so much? There’s something about that ‘group’ or ‘movement’ or whatever it is they call themselves that makes me want to shower and read a hymnal. I’ve come up with a list of things that I think really drive me crazy, and I’ll share it with you here.
1. “Reinventing” hymns by adding really stupid choruses or changing the rhythm enough to screw up the congregation.
2. Using terms that are obviously made up, like, “I left it on the stage,”** which infers telling the truth or something.
3. Hair styles that are supposed to look like they’re not washed, but in fact, are washed and conditioned and styled.
4. Blogging daily thoughts, set lists, guitar polish techniques, coffee bean roasting problems and beard progress.
5. Deep cut V-neck tee shirts.
6. U2, though sometimes wonderful and full of truth, is not always appropriate for congregational participation.
7. Deodorant isn’t a sin, and cologne isn’t ‘poison.’
Now that I’ve shared my list of issues with the group, let me put to words what I guess truly bugs me (over and above the rest). I think when I look at a set list for a worship team, I try to get a feel for what kind of church it is by the songs they sing. And lately I’ve noticed that this type/style/sect of church tends to stick to a very specific vein of worship songs. In a 5 song setlist, there will be 3 Hillsong United songs. I love that group. They put out wonderful music. But I’m pretty sure they’re not the only people that put out worship music. And a lot of it is hard to sing along to. But that band wears tight jeans, has beards and uses funny terms when describing themselves. For the other two songs in the setlist, I’d be willing to bet that there’s a Chris Tomlin song, because everybody gets down with Chris Tomlin… and because he loves to rock the slow jams to Jesus (and how are you going to get people to come down to the altar without a Tomlin song?!?!) The other song in the setlist is ALWAYS, WITHOUT A DOUBT a hymn. It always starts with just a voice and maybe an acoustic guitar. Then as the song hits the chorus (or just before), the whole band kicks in and people raise their hands. Nothing wrong with instrumental dynamics or singing hymns or raising hands. All of those things are wonderful. But the setlist is 100 times out of 100 the same. I don’t know what the deal is, but I think I’m gonna hold off for a few more years before using that equation.
Am I alone here?
*The post-seeker movement is the group of churches that typically label themselves ‘outside the box,’ spell words strangely in their church name, call their sanctuary something weird like Conversation Promenade, brew and drink coffee that comes from places only Willy Wonka has heard of, and all seem to look like they need a bath.
** Everybody knows that the term, ‘I left it on the stage’ means that somebody farted on the stage.

6 responses to “Take a shower, weirdo!”
Erin
March 14th, 2011 at 12:56
Ahh, Ben! I loved reading this. LOVED reading this. I’m sure you have heard of the stuffchristianslike guy (Jon someone or other) – his posts about “How Metro is Your Worship Pastor?” and deep vee-neck tees are both spot-on, hilarious, and slightly troubling when you think “hmm, this is actually happening in a lot of churches!” I wonder what you would think of the church Peter & I go to in Battle Creek. I know the people running the sound & lighting and our worship leader are all passionate about using excellent worship as a way to bring others into communication with God – and I’m a part of that team to be sure, singing and being involved on the off-Sunday’s. But as my friends aptly put it, there’ the danger of it becoming a “Dancing Bear Show” (think circus atmosphere) where the lighting is TOO much, there is TOO MUCH fog machine action, etc. Eh. Hard to encapsulate my thoughts in a blog response. Talk to me sometime and we can jam with words.
Sherry
March 14th, 2011 at 19:04
good stuff. i particularly liked the part about the naming the sanctuary weird names…
Ben Barnes
March 14th, 2011 at 19:39
I’m thinking of naming the rooms in my house. So far, the bathroom is ‘Fred Penner’s Place’ and the living room is ‘Comforthouse: The Room With Several Places To Sit.’
Jeremy
March 14th, 2011 at 19:20
So, you seem to be making that assumption that hipsters can’t be genuine. Or that following a formula means you’re more concerned with image/name than worship itself.
Not that crazy-neck-beard-wierdos can’t be more wrapped up in appearance than a worshipful attitude, but I have met a lot of suit-wearing, old-dude-haircut-having, nothing-but-hymn-signing folks who were all wrapped up in what they were doing and not why.
Sometimes, wearing a ridiculous woven fedora, not shaving, and wearing skinny jeans is just because you want to craft a certain look or want to appear relevant to your audiences.
But yes, sometimes it means you’re a dufus.
Ben Barnes
March 14th, 2011 at 19:34
I agree that old people can be every bit as non-genuine as young people. And sure, it’s your choice to grow facial hair and wear jeans that aren’t made for your gender. And I can almost see your point about following a formula being ok. But the point is this, and I’m sure you picked up on it… just because you use the same songs as some huge international church with a worship epic machine does NOT mean you’re relevant. What I keep seeing is the same young, very green worship leaders trying to recreate some experience they had in college by doing the wrong thing in the wrong place, but then somehow not do well at it because they have little experience and very limited verbal leadership skills. Because instead they’ve been shopping at Urban Outfitters and Target’s Hipster section, desperately trying to look like they understand what it is they’re doing. A hat and a beard and socially awkward jeans don’t make up for ability or anointing. Playing guitar isn’t leading worship, and using the same formula in worship cannot make up for the work of the Holy Spirit. Plus, the beards look crazy… Charlie Sheen crazy.
Jeremy
March 15th, 2011 at 16:19
Too true. Almost as crazy as a young nascent worship leader with crazy bleached hair, and a sad, sad two day growth of facial hair.
I have pictures!